“ The Universe loves grateful people. The more grateful you are, the more you get to be grateful about. It’s that simple”  

In our journey called life, we have come across both, people who are grateful for everything in their life and also people who are not so grateful. Meeting grateful people makes us wonder how they manage to be the way they are in the first place. Grateful people have a magical personality. They believe that it’s not happy people who are thankful, but thankful people who are happy. Everyone wants to be happy, contented and grateful but why is it that we keep sticking to an “attitude of ingratitude”.

Being grateful is a habit that can be learned. The question is how ? The first step is recognizing the fact that we are not being as grateful as we can be. It is always easier to make a new habit than eliminating the bad one. So focus on being grateful for all the little things instead of focussing on all the negative things that grab all our attention. Eventually we will start experiencing the good feelings that grateful habits give us.

So, here’s how we can become more grateful -

1. ALWAYS REMEMBER, HAPPINESS IS A CHOICE

“Happiness is a choice. Some pursue happiness, others create it.”

In any given situation we have two choices - be happy for what went well or keep on brooding for what didn’t go so right. Happiness is a state of mind and a choice we make. We have the power to choose our thoughts and in turn our feelings. We decide how we respond to the situation and can choose whether to play victim or overcome the challenge to be successful. Not acting in a situation is also a decision we make. So being happy and grateful is a choice. In a difficult situation be grateful for the lesson and keep moving.

2. CHANGE WEAKNESSES INTO STRENGTHS

“Never underestimate your strengths, never overestimate your weaknesses.”

We are a product of our strengths and weaknesses so while our strengths build our personalities, our weaknesses pull us down. Being vulnerable and helpless in a situation is a gift because it is when we feel vulnerable that we allow  ourself to think differently and try newer pastures. This is surely not comfortable but it teaches you how to convert weaknesses into strengths

The best way out is to acknowledge our own mistakes and take help from others if necessary. We are all imperfect people needing support to overcome our imperfections. Every person who enters our life affects us in one way or the other. Without them we could never be what we are today so be grateful for the people who have in some way helped us in turning our vulnerabilities into strengths.

3. CONNECT WITH PEOPLE WHO MAKE US HAPPY

“Once you learn how to be happy, you won't tolerate being around people who make you feel anything less”

Research shows that gratitude helps in maintaining a good mood, and positive social and spiritual connectedness. When we connect with people who make us happy, we enjoy being valued. We connect with people whose energy matches our own and who receive us the way we are, without any judgement. Gratitude is being thankful for both the experience and the lessons.

4. SPEND TIME WITH THOSE WHO ARE SUFFERING

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.”

When we see people who are suffering, we get to know how blessed we are. This is also an experience as it makes us look at life more closely. More often the things we take for granted are things someone else is praying for. Give time to people who are ill, we learn to be grateful for your health, visit an orphanage and we learn to be grateful for your family, visit a homeless shelter, it will help us to be grateful for a home. All these experiences give us a close look at how people are living with far less than what we have.

5. WRITE A GRATITUDE JOURNAL

“Be grateful for small things, big things and everything in between. Count your blessings and not your problems”

Maintaining a gratitude journal helps us become more grateful. Research shows that people who focus on their blessings are more healthy physically, emotionally and psychologically. The best way of practicing this is to write down five things we are grateful for each day just before going to bed. It will give you a sense of peace from the inside.

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Emotional Intelligence or EQ is the talk of the world today and many believe that emotional Intelligence is more important than Intelligence quotient or IQ. Why is it so? While IQ is related to analytical, logical, reasoning and memory related abilities, Emotional intelligence is about how they manage their emotions and their state of mind to get better results even in emotionally challenging situations. Emotional Intelligence is not just managing our emotions, it also helps in managing the emotions of people around us.

Generally in difficult situations, we tend to get into the fight or flight mode automatically. To manage overwhelming situations we can practice the NLP technique of Stop, Drop and Process or simply SDP. Mentioned below are the list of things that make us emotionally intelligent:

1. CHECK YOUR EMOTIONS,THEY CHANGE YOUR WORLD

“Feelings are much like waves, we can’t stop them from coming but we can choose which one to surf.”

Emotionally Intelligent people watch their thoughts, feelings and emotions. They know that feelings like ripples in water can change their world. Emotional self awareness is very important to keep our thoughts, emotions and in turn our life in control. They neither ignore nor do they let their emotions go haywire. Though they might sometime use more of their heart over brain, they have a deep understanding of their feelings and are also sensitive to the feelings of people around them.

2. PAY ATTENTION TO OTHER PEOPLE’S FEELINGS

“Respect people’s feelings. Even if doesn’t mean anything to you, it could mean everything to them.”

Emotionally Intelligent people are more empathetic, meaning they get into the other person’s shoes to understand how other people feel. They are good listeners and have healthy open relationships. They are good with recognizing even those feelings which are not very obvious. They are also good at understanding the needs and viewpoints of others and resolve situations accordingly.

3. CONTROL THEIR EMOTIONS

“Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions.”

Emotionally Intelligent people are in full control of their emotions and don’t get carried away by what others feel or say. They have a positive attitude under all circumstances which helps them to look at things in a different light. They celebrate life even when they know they are alone. They, hence, bounce back quickly from negative emotions and situations.

4. DON’T PLAY VICTIM

“No person playing victim ever changed the world.”

Emotionally intelligent people are highly aware of their feelings and don’t blame others or situations for what is happening in their lives. They understand that they can always take charge of their emotions and also their life. They don’t like to constantly complain about their feelings and situations. They instead plan better outcomes by staying focussed and redirecting their energy into more positive thoughts. They take full responsibility of whatever happens in their life.

5. STAY HUNGRY

“Work hard and stay hungry, lazy people get nowhere in life.”

Becoming complacent hinders growth and Emotionally intelligent people not only achieve their goals, they also keep setting new goals. They are self-motivated individuals who work past their fears and leave footprints in the sand. They believe in themselves and always welcome change. They know that success awaits when we go out of our comfort zone. They constantly drive themselves to newer pastures to lead a more exciting life.

6. IDENTIFY THE ROOT-CAUSE OF EMOTIONS

“Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and come forth later in uglier ways.”

Emotionally intelligent people know that it’s very important to express our emotions and understand why they feel a certain way. They try to understand if there are any past references that are hindering their growth and work towards resolving old conflicts. This emotional self awareness helps them in finding the best approach to any given situation.

7. CHOOSE THEIR OWN BATTLES

“Be selective in your battles, sometimes peace is better than being right.”

Emotionally intelligent people know that emotions carry energy and it’s wise to pick our battles selectively. They don’t pick on every brick thrown at them. They respond to situations rather than reacting to it. They avoid heated arguments with people unless there isn’t a way out. Conflicts generally drain our energy so they preserve their energy for more constructive and positive outcomes and situations.

8. STOP GOSSIPING

“If it’s not your business, Don’t spread it”

Emotionally intelligent people don’t get into gossip. They understand that nothing relevant comes out of gossip and more often it does more harm than good to people. They prefer having more constructive, positive and deeper conversation with people. They value the time they spend with people and believe in quality time instead of quantity time. They encourage people to have more meaningful discussions and closer connections.

9. SET CLEAR LIMITS

“Givers need to set limits, because takers rarely do.”

Emotionally intelligent people know that they can do everything for people all the time. They understand that we all have our limitations and so cannot address everything according to people’s expectations. So when people ask for any favours the answer is either a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’. Maybe is never an answer to any questions put to them. When they agree to do something they make sure they keep up to their word.

10. DON’T GIVE UP ON ACCOUNT OF PEER PRESSURE

Emotionally intelligent people believe in themselves. They believe in leaving a trail in a place there was none. So they don’t do things just because someone told them do. They are not in the race to please people. They never try to follow suit and instead think independently. They have a headstrong attitude, and often go against the grain. Though they listen respectfully to other people’s opinions, they don’t get carried away by them. They carefully analyze the pros and cons of every situation and get to a solution. They believe more in self-approval rather than peer pressure.

Macro PIC with MOTOG

I never seen before like this cake

Ganesh making with Coffee CUP